Posted by: Quilly | December 27, 2007

The Great Gecko Hunter

As usual, they were sitting on the couch side-by-side. He had spread sheets from work up on his computer screen and was muttering to himself. She was reading. Presently She put down her novel and walked to the bathroom.

In the bathroom She reached for the hardwood toilet seat lid and it moved. She let out a tiny shriek, then a big bellow: “Hon! Do I have to share the bathroom with a gecko?”

He said: “Of course not.”

She heard his laptop close and settle on the coffee table. His footsteps approached. He appeared in the bathroom doorway. She scrunched over to let him in. She pointed and said: “It ran behind the wastebasket.” Then, as He reached out She added: “Be careful. It’s huge and it tried to eat me.”

He glanced over his shoulder, gave her that look and queried dryly: “How big is huge?”

She said: “At least three inches. Maybe four if you count the tail.”

He said: “Ri-ight.” Then He moved the wastebasket. There the monster was! He said: “Two inches, max, with the tail, and it’s a female. Probably just looking for a place to nest and have her babies.”

“Does it have to be in my bathroom?” She queried.

He said: “I’ll see if we can avoid that.” He reached for the lizard. It ran behind the toilet. He said: “Go get me the empty Kleenex box you just tossed in the trash.”

She complied, then watched him open one end, wondering to herself if He knew there was a huge hole in the top of the box. She didn’t ask. She has learned that He usually knows what He is doing.

He reached behind the toilet with the box in his hand. The lizard darted from behind the toilet and huddled in the corner near the sink cabinet. He tried to pick it up. It darted back behind the toilet. Again He brandished the Kleenex box. The lizard dashed into the corner near the bathtub, then back again to the corner behind the sink.

“It’s scared!” She said.

Really?” He queried.

She ignored his sarcasm and ordered: “Don’t hurt the poor little thing!”

He paused, hunched over the toilet, arms circling the tank, glanced over his shoulder and gave her that look.

She smiled all bright and cheerful and said: “I’ll be quiet now.”

He grunted and turned his attention back to the gecko. This time when it ran into the corner, He put the box down in front of it and reached down behind the gecko with his other hand. She saw that He meant to scare the lizard into the box. It had other ideas and ran up the bathroom wall. He plucked it from the wall and held it gently inside his cupped hands.

She scooted out of the bathroom and hustled into the living room to open the door. He followed. They walked out onto the landing. He opened his hands. The gecko raised her head and looked at him, but didn’t try to move. He held it.

The gecko stirred just a bit, moving from the palm of his hand to his wrist. She said, “It likes you, you’re warm. Besides, with all that hair she probably thinks she’s safe in a forest.

He grunted and lowered the gecko to the floor. It stayed where He put it.

She queried: “Did you hurt her?”

He picked the lizard up again and looked it over in the palm of his hand. “No,” He answered. “I think she’s just tired.” Once again He lowered the lizard to the floor. This time it scurried from his fingers and slipped into a crack between two boards.

She threw her arms around him and swooned theatrically, “My hero!”

He gave her that look and groaned, but He returned the hug.



  1. They lay eggs, love. No risk of setting up a gecko obstetrics clinic in our flat. Thank goodness.

  2. Every once in awhile we get tree frogs in our house. The cats love that. 😀

  3. ohhh… poor thing!
    hope both female characters came out unscathed

  4. OC — I know they lay eggs, but would you believe that this morning I couldn’t for the life of me remember how to spell ‘lay’? I had a synapse melt-down.

    Brian — we have no cats, and I wouldn’t like it if we did and they tortured the geckos! Besides, then instead of finding whole dead lizards here and there around the house, I’d find pieces of dead lizards. NOT a more appealing prospect.

    Polona — I am well. The gecko hasn’t come back to report in, but she is no longer hiding in the crevasse on the porch.

  5. Geckos in the house are a sign of good luck where I’m from.

  6. Mumma — many years ago when I lived in LA, I stepped on a gecko in the middle of the night. It squished between my toes. That didn’t feel really lucky.

    Last week I found a dead gecko in OC’s CD collection. A couple of thousand ants were trying to clean it up for me on my occasional table. That didn’t feel so lucky, either.

    I also found one self-baked in the light of my sewing machine. The sizzle and smell caught my attention … not feeling so lucky there, either.

    If they’d stay alive and eat the ants and mosquitoes, I’d be feeling lucky.

  7. Awwwwww… I LOVE a happy ending!

  8. A wonderful story with a happy ending. I hope you and OC have a very Happy New Year

  9. Melli — I’m pretty sure the gecko does, too!

    Bill — Happy New YEar to you, too!

  10. Regarding the ice cube, perhaps next time put the cold glass on your bite that way you will not have to fish out an ice cube or figure out what to do with it later.

    A two inch gecko….on the toilet seat….my worst fear is sitting on the toilet and then something biting me from the inside….

  11. That so, Lori? Then I guess you wouldn’t have wanted to be with me on my trip to the Out Islands of the Bahamas

  12. Lori — but I wanted to put my fingers in OC’s tea. Of course, if you tell him that I’ll deny it.

    OC — Oh. Hi, hon! 🙂

  13. And it didn’t even try to sell you some insurance.

  14. Dr. John — she may have been checking out her own insurance policy in search of an “attack by gigantic monster” codicil.

  15. You should share your space better. Jeez.

    Come see the new words, dahlink.

    Oh, and Happy New Year!

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