As you regular readers surely know by now, Quilly will soon be leaving her duties as professional nappy-changer, and taking up a new post teaching fifth grade – which is what she was hoping she’d be doing in the first place.
As a skilled teacher of English as a Second Language, she’ll likely be charged with improving the reading scores of kids speaking Hawai‘ian pidgin and other foreign tongues. And in the process, I’m sure to be hearing, frequently, a phrase acquired in Las Vegas (where the principal foreign tongue traces its ancestry to Iberia) and vividly alive today. One that is now my favorite (OK, my only) phrase in Spanish:
¡Inglés es loco!
You wish proof that English, as a language, is nutso? Consider …
I was reading Joel’s latest post – he scours the USA for church signs that punch the “What were they thinking?” button. One of those signs reads “In the beginning, God; keep it that way”. As if we had any say over the activities of a being which we credit with omnipotence, omniscience, omnipresence, all that … I mean, whatever happened with staring out the cave mouth at the starry starry night and experiencing the vastness, the magnificence, with awe …
Hey, wait a minute. Somebody tells me that, I’m not going to feel magnificent, I’m going to feel like I’ve screwed up. If I don’t know “somebody” pretty well, I might even think some offense was meant, and a different kind of person than I might be tempted to introduce the speaker to a culinary treat: the knuckle sandwich.
Since when did “wondrous” turn into “disgusting?”
Now, persons of a certain age, Cooper, actually do have a word that means “wondrous”. Which I hope to hear on those occasions when I do something approaching half right.
OK, that works … hey, wait a minute! How the hell did we get to a state where “some” awe is cooler than “full of” awe? Huh? Huh??
I tell you. ¡Inglés es loco! Right?
OK, all together now. One, two, three …
– O Ceallaigh
Copyright © 2008 Felloffatruck Publications. All wrongs deplored.
All opinions are mine as a private citizen.