Another Fine Evening At The Club

“Well, Reg, can’t say that I’ve heard a lot about the public school furlough days lately.”

“Told you they’d get used to it, Syd. It figures that folk would squawk when the furloughs first hit and they had to change their plans. We stay the course just a little bit more, and those same people will be telling us to keep the furloughs in place, ’cause they don’t want to have to change their schedules again. Which suits us just fine, of course. We have to pay enough to school our own brats, don’t wish to have to pay for anyone else’s.”

“The people are so easily led, aren’t they, Reg.”

“That they are. Not to mention distracted. Throw them the promise of a few bogus bargains, and they’ll curl up at your feet in the cold and wet to have a chance at getting some. Amazing how the promise of $100 off an item that was marked up $250 two weeks before Thanksgiving will make people forget about furloughs.”

“And then there’s that golfer. Guy cracks his SUV into a tree at 2 in the morning and gets a bloody nose out of it, a simple numbskull piece of driving, and there’s nothing else on the news. When they’re not busting themselves shopping, in more ways than one, John Q. Public is trying to figure out Tiger’s dirty little secrets.”

“Bless their filthy little minds, Syd. The more time they spend minding the business of Mr. Woods, the less time they have to mind ours. But you know the story that really warmed my heart?”

You have a …”

“Syd, I’m ashamed of you. You know I have a soft spot for children. Especially ours. So you can imagine my joy when I heard that another struggling elementary school was being bought out by a private concern that specializes in children of means and sending them to the only schools that matter. The private schools. Our schools. And the staff were happy about it.

“That is good news. Cognac?”

“That’s top drawer stuff, Syd. Don’t mind if I do.”

  – O Ceallaigh
Copyright © 2009 Felloffatruck Publications. All wrongs deplored.
All opinions are mine as a private citizen.


  1. Oh boy. We had a teacher-parent meeting yesterday, which reinforced my conviction that my son just isn’t best served by a two-room country school that doesn’t have the resources to deal with a child with his needs.

    Back in WV, there’s a lovely autism-centered school with one-on-one teaching and amazing ideas, but even if we moved we couldn’t afford to send him there. We can’t afford it of course because we have a special-needs child who needs at least one parent home with him full-time…

    On the plus side, I had a fun discussion with fellow panelists on Saturday, as we marveled (and tried to copy) the gift Sky News presenters have for receiving one sentence of news (“Tiger Woods go boom”) and rewording it for an audience for over an hour until another sentence of news comes in—so they can tell us (for example) exactly which hospital he went to afterwards, for another hour. Surely something ELSE happened somewhere in the world, during all this time?!

    • Of course there’s plenty of news elsewhere, Susan. The media moguls, however, know exactly what We the People will pay for. Unfortunately for them, the vestiges of the decency laws prevent them from fully exploiting this opportunity, so they turn to the next best thing. Gossip. Delivered just like a soap opera, one plot item per week (for a show that airs daily). This is how the moguls make their untold billions, so they can make a publicity splash using an hour’s worth of earnings to fund the construction of schools for autistic children. Which typically bear their names and, in order to continue to be worthy of those names, have to earn their keep through overcharging their charges.

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