He and She: Twitter Feeder

Pine siskin (Spinus pinus)
Pine siskin (Spinus pinus)
She: “Did you get the bird seed?”

He: “Up close and personal. Even got its picture.”

She: “You took a picture of a bag of bird seed?

He: “Who said anything about a bag? I seed the bird, I grabbed my phone …”

She: “Never mind. For a cell phone, it’s not a bad shot. How’d you get that close?”

He: “Must’ve been the bird seed.”

She: “[…]”

He: “It is a pretty bird. Kinda.”

She: “Yeah. Pretty mean.”

He: “What do you mean by that?”

She: “I’d tell you, but you’re not exactly an average guy.”

He: “Tell me anyway, I’ll see if I can make it add up.”

She: “Be a downer if you couldn’t. You see any other birds at that feeder?”

He: “Now that you mention it, no. Was this one sneaking a between-meals snack?”

She: “Yeah. Along with half of the rest of the birds on the island. Or, they would be if this one hadn’t driven them all off!

He: “Oh. It’s a minor bird.”

She: “Uh huh. It lands on the feeder and declares ‘Mine!‘ Any other birds come close, it chases them away. And it squeaks at them!”

He: “Squeaks?”

She: “Yeah. Look. There it goes now. Two of them, in fact, squabbling. Hear that?”

He:That, love, is a twitter.”

She: “A twitter?

He: “Yep.”

She: “So you’re telling me …”

He: “… that birds only make that ‘happy little birdie noise’ when they’re claiming space, threatening each other, or are actually fighting.”

She: “You mean, like, on the computer?

He: “Kinda. Especially the ‘claiming space’ part. What else are 140 characters good for?”

She: “You aren’t going to tweet that, are you?”

He: “I’m not that much of a bird brain. Am I?”


  1. He IS a bird brain. He has that bird’s photo as his screen saver instead of mine, and thought I wouldn’t notice that he replaced me with another chick.

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